Donna Arnold and Willie Laws had family on their side, but age was another matter.
"His mother and my grandmother were best friends," Donna says. "We were members of the same church, and my family attended the church with my grandmother."
Despite the family and church connection, they did not know each other well.
"He told his nephew that he liked me and he sent his nephew over to deliver that message to me for him," says Donna, who at 14 looked more mature than her years. "I kind of tricked him into thinking I was older. I knew he was older, but I didn't know how much older."
They talked at church that day and he asked her to meet him later at a little store nearby, on Sixth Avenue in Pine Bluff.
"I went and he wasn't there," Donna says.
Willie had been late getting there, and Donna had already left by the time he arrived. In talking with the owner, though, he discovered her fib.
"The owner of the store said there was a pretty little girl that was here to see you, but she left," Donna says.
The owner knew Donna's family and his family as well, and she mentioned Donna's actual age to him.
"I guess we kind of lost contact after that," Willie says.
There are five years between them -- inconsequential now, but much too big a gap back then.
A few years went by before they would talk again. Donna had spent the summer with her sister, and when she returned to Pine Bluff, Willie saw her again at church. Her grandmother had mentioned to her that Willie was getting married, but Donna could not believe that -- so she asked him.
"He just laughed it off," she says. "I went home and told my grandmother he was not getting married."
Donna called him after that, just to chat. He was washing his car then, and they talked about how they had planned to meet at the store years earlier and how that did not work out -- and why.
Willie asked Donna, by now a junior in high school, to go with him to a carnival in town.
"We just went to the carnival and played games," Willie says.
Their first date was on Sept. 3, 1985.
"He picked me up that evening," she says. "We went on a date and we talked, and we continued talking."
They talked on the phone and at church, and they went out on dates around their small town.
When she was a senior in high school, Donna found out she was pregnant. She and Willie decided not to rush into marriage then.
Donna walked with her class during graduation and she got a job at a college where she could also take classes.
"I was working nights and going to college in the daytime, trying to provide for the family," Willie says.
After their son was born and their relationship was stronger, they determined it was time to tie the knot.
"I had wanted to wait until I finished college but that didn't happen," he says. "I loved her, we fell in love, and everything just came together."
They were married on Sept. 3, 1988.
"We didn't have a huge wedding," Donna says. "It was just the preacher, my husband and I, my stepdad, my mom, his mom and dad and grandmother -- that was it. We did it at my mom's house in Watson Chapel."
They had punch and cake, and Donna did not even want a ring.
"I just wanted to be married," she says.
They took a honeymoon trip to Killeen, Texas, where Donna's sister's husband was stationed in the military at Fort Hood.
For their 15th anniversary, they renewed their vows.
"We actually had a complete wedding," says Donna, "because we didn't have a formal wedding. We had the whole nine yards -- the bridesmaids, the reception, everything."
They celebrated their 30th anniversary, in 2018, with a seven-day cruise in the Bahamas, and they enjoyed it so much they took another cruise the next year, to Jamaica, the Cayman Islands and Mexico.
"We were scheduled to go again in 2020, but we didn't get to go due to covid," Donna says. "But we were blessed to go back last year with my Watson Chapel class of 1987."
Willie works for the Arkansas Department of Corrections and is the pastor of Missionary Baptist Church in Altheimer. He did finish his college degree in business, after they married, at Arkansas Baptist College in Little Rock.
The Lawses went on to have four children, and then they became foster parents. They recently adopted two daughters from foster care.
"No marriage is perfect, I don't believe," Willie says.
Donna agrees.
"I mean, we've had some ups and downs but I tell everybody all of our good days have outweighed our bad days, so I won't complain," Donna says. "He has been a great husband and a great father, provider, to me and our family. We started out rocky 39 years ago, with me not telling him my real age, so we believe in trust and honesty now, and I think that's key."
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The first time I saw my future spouse:
She says: "I thought he was handsome."
He says: "I thought she was pretty."
On our wedding day:
She says: "I was super excited, and I was nervous."
He says: "She laid my suit out for me and when I came home from work the preacher was there."
My advice for a long happy marriage is:
She says: "You have to put God first. And you need to keep other people out of your relationship, good or bad. I believe in keeping some things private and just seeking God for advice."
He says: "Be able to trust one another and love one another, and to forgive one another. No marriage is perfect."