"They have vilified me, they have crucified me, yes, they have even criticized me."
--Mayor Daley I of Chicago
"Let's take a vote. I'm the chairman. I vote Aye, and the motion is carried."
--Huey Long of Winnsboro, La.
It seems that Illinois and Louisiana get to have all the fun politicians. A young reporter around here remembers Edwin Edwards coming out of a federal courtroom back in the day when a journalist smarty-pants type yelled, "Governor! Do you have anything to hide?" And Gov. Edwards replied, "Yes, but not in regard to this case."
Once upon a time, young uns, reporters got to have fun. Even in Arkansas. There were no diversity meetings scheduled by HR, or suits in the newsroom calling the newspaper "The Product," or newspeak jargon ruining editorials. The job was a blast. Which is why so many young people flocked to J-schools. It certainly wasn't the lure of money.
We were reminded of the Good Ol' Days mid-week when a friend/editorial writer/fellow inky wretch from Wisconsin posted a photo of a gang of turkeys outside his newspaper office. He thought they might have wanted an editorial board meeting to discuss this Thanksgiving thing the humans have going. But his considered editorial opinion was that he couldn't endorse Tofurky.
The emails from editorial writers around the nation pinged for the rest of the day. "Did they have a wishbone to pick?" "Thanks for the sage (and rosemary) advice." "It was about thyme." Etc. Etc. Dad Jokes. Etc.
Then somebody mentioned Monroe Schwarzlose.
An Arkansas connection!
Of course, anybody of a certain age in these latitudes can never forget Monroe Schwarzlose, retired turkey farmer from Cleveland County in general and Kingsland in particular. (That's down the road from Fordyce.)
When nobody else ponied up to challenge Gov. Bill Clinton in the 1980 Democratic primary for governor, Monroe Schwarzlose decided to give the people an option. And what an option!
Mr. Schwarzlose campaigned in an old truck, and passed out home canning recipes as campaign literature. He advocated taking care of two problems at once by filling potholes with hazardous waste. And in 1980--when Bill Clinton was suffering from Cubans, car tags and Carter--Mr. Schwarzlose would get 31 percent of the vote in the Democratic primary. And Bill Clinton would go on to lose the general to Frank White. (Gov. White's contribution to Arkansas' political lexicon: "That would open a whole box of Pandoras.")
And here we thought, smack dab in the middle of the two holidays, that the first week of December would be a drag, editorial speaking. And nothing much would be interesting again until The Ledge meets come January.
Instead, we get turkeys on the hoof, a Monroe Schwarzlose reference, and a reminder of when statewide politics could be, on occasion, fun. Thanks to our editorial friends for the reminder.
And a good time was had by all.