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Hillary Clinton is on tour. Like a rock star. During her Los Angeles stop last Saturday, the former two-time Democratic presidential hopeful sat on stage in an upholstered piece (a chair, not her pantsuit) that looked like a prop from the PBS kids' show "The Big Comfy Couch." Approachable homeyness was the intended cue.

Among things covered in her "Evening with the Clintons" event, the political matriarch said "I think it's also critical to understand that, as I've been telling candidates who have come to see me, you can run the best campaign, you can even become the nominee, and you can have the election stolen from you."

Perhaps that was true in the first case as she was denied the Democratic Party nomination when Barack Obama, the great hope for the party, stepped in, cancelling the coronation due her as reward for enduring that philandering Arkansan she married. In those days, was Clinton the diabolical Lady Macbeth doing whatever it took to gain the realm for King Willie the Slick? Or is she now Blanche Dubois, hanging paper lanterns to diffuse the harsh glare of reality illuminating consequences of her own deeds? I think the latter.

The 2016 election was not "stolen." She wasn't politically mugged by purse-stealing Russians. Instead, she removed the winning lottery ticket from her clutch and tossed it into the gutter with one elitist statement spoken a mere two months before the 2016 election: "You know, to just be grossly generalistic, you could put half of Trump's supporters into what I call the basket of deplorables ... They're racist, sexist, homophobic, xenophobic, Islamophobic -- you name it".

When I heard that I knew: Dear woman, you just snatched defeat from the jaws of victory.

Then, on Sunday and from the other side of our nation, President Donald Trump had his own out-of-touch- with-reality moment.

In a tweet (how else?) he opined: "Despite the tremendous success that I have had as President, including perhaps the greatest ECONOMY and most successful first two years of any President in history, they have stollen [sic] two years of my (our) Presidency (Collusion Delusion) that we will never be able to get back."

Stollen: the traditional German Christmas fruit and nut cake. Yep, Democrat voters should agree with the president. We've had two years of really nutty fruitcake in the White House.

In a strange twist, even though Clinton lost and Trump won, they are both acting like sore losers. Clinton has only herself to blame for insulting the vast unwashed, many of whom may have actually been undecided until she tossed them into that basket. It was a strange but telling faux pas considering her years spent in Arkansas, dead center of flyover country.

And typographical error aside, Trump, likewise has no one to blame but himself for his mess, two years running thus far. Russian interference, suspected collusion and possible "spygate" could have been avoided in some ways if the candidate and his minions had been transparent and diligent in the first place. Ground rules should have been laid for campaign members to avoid even the appearance of impropriety. This would be similar to training given to us sales guys decades ago by a former employer's internal legal counsel regarding price fixing and collusion. For example, at a trade meeting where competitors may come together "noshing" (the attorney was Jewish) at happy hour, we were told what to do if conversations turned to fixing prices or divvying up customers. "Spill your drink on your lap," he instructed, "so that no one can forget you were such a putz, excuse yourself and then call me, your group attorney."

This is exactly what former Trump aide George Papadopoulos should have done when invited for drinks with that fetching, fake operative pimped out by our very own FBI. He should have spilled his drink, departed and hastily phoned candidate Trump's attorney. But oops! That attorney could well have been Michael Cohen, who just Monday checked into the Otisville, New York, "Club Fed" prison.

Lacking absolute exoneration, Trump will continue to be investigated. Democrats will overturn rocks already examined and subpoena documents to which they have no legal right. In retribution, congressional Republicans and Trump's Justice Department will righteously investigate the instigators.

Washington will remain a psychiatric ward for histrionic personality disorder patients adverse to therapy while scant governing occurs for two more years.

At least. Thankfully the economy is humming, we're busy at real work and paychecks are somewhat larger. But for that, we're in a deplorable situation.

Commentary on 05/09/2019

Print Headline: Neither Clinton nor Trump suffered stolen presidencies

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