July is the snap-flash-pop month of fireworks, fireflies and fired-up grills -- a month to be aware of sharks, appreciative of cows, and save room for a foot-long hot dog
1 International Joke Day, National Horseradish Month and jokes about this month's hot-as-horseradish weather in Arkansas:
• July is so hot -- Eureka Springs feels like Paprika Springs, and people go to Hot Springs to cool off.
• July is so-oo hot -- even ding-dong daddies droop in Dumas.
• July is so-ooo hot -- it feels seared in Searcy, grilled in Hamburg, burned in Pangburn, stoked up in Coal Hill and generally smacked over, not just in Smackover.
SAUCERS AND SCOFFERS
2 World UFO Day.
Twinkle, twinkle, little light;
How I wonder if you might:
Be a ship from Planet Klingon,
Saturn maids with moonstone rings on,
Little men with big bravados
Colored green like avocados;
Might you be all that above? --
Or just a firefly seeking love.
'TATER' TALK
3 Idaho Admission Day, 1890. Idaho admits to what happened when they squashed a Big Idaho Potato in a bowl with butter. They did the mash, they did the Monster Mash.
IT'S A GRAND OLD FLAG
4 Independence Day.
SZT! -- BOOM! -- AHH!
Arkansas Democrat-Gazette Pops on the River, the state's largest Fourth of July celebration, 3-10:30 p.m. in the River Market District, downtown Little Rock. Arkansas Symphony Orchestra, fireworks about 9:30 p.m. Details at arkansasonline.com/pops. Call (501) 378-3807.
GO FOURTH
Independence Day Games and Races include cracker whistling and watermelon seed-spitting. 10 a.m.-5 p.m. at Ozark Folk Center State Park, Mountain View. Details at ozarkfolkcenter.com. Call (870) 269-3851.
Eureka Springs' bang-up birthday. The twisty city was founded on July 4, 1879. (Birthday stroll, 5-8 p.m. Saturday, June 30.) Details at eurekaspringshistoricalmuseum.org. Call (479) 253-9417.
TOP TO BOTTOM
5 National Bikini Day -- a teeny-weeny observance.
BORN NOBODY'S FOOL
Circus man P.T. Barnum's birthday, 1810. Barnum exhibited which of these strange sights, some real and some not: (A) The Fiji Mermaid, part monkey and part fish; (B) Three-foot-tall Gen. Tom Thumb; (C) A time-traveling merry-go-round; (D) Siamese twins Chang and Eng; (E) Skin-and-bones Isaac Sprague, the "Living Human Skeleton."
Answer at July 25.
SMARTPHONES,
DUMB MANNERS
6 Cellphone Courtesy Month and rules of courteous cellphone behavior:
• When choosing a ringtone, please avoid "Water Drip Torture," "Bagpipe Mania," and "Howling Monkey."
• The courteous way to make a cellphone call on the way up is to take the stairs.
• Properly thrown, a cellphone will skip at least three times across DeGray Lake.
ANY WAY YOU WANT IT
7 Journey and Def Leppard, 7 p.m. at Verizon Arena, North Little Rock. Details at verizonarena.com. Call (800) 745-3000.
SKIN IN THE GAME
8 Nude Recreation Week.
Bare on a dare,
Buff in the rough;
Bald completely,
Sunburned neatly;
Knees to the breeze,
Covered in leaves.
CONE, SWEET CONE
9 National Ice Cream Month -- the season to churn, churn, churn.
WANNA WAVE A WAND
10 Fairy and Wizards Tea children's party, 3 p.m. at Garvan Woodland Gardens, Hot Springs. Details at garvangardens.com. Call (800) 366-4664.
I AM A ROVIN' GAMBOLER
National Picnic Month, Teddy Bear Picnic Day -- and perfect opportunity to learn which ones are fire ants.
THE WAY TO MAKE
A BIG ENTRANCE
IS THROUGH THE POMPA-DOOR
11 Musical Grease through Aug. 25, Murry's Dinner playhouse, Little Rock. Details at murrysdp.com. Call (501) 562-3131.
SLICK PROPOSITION
"You're the One That I Want" is the hit song from Grease that goes: (A) "Ho, ho, ho, Henry;" (B) "Oh, oh, oh, honey," or (C) "Hoo, hoo, hoo, baby."
Answer at July 27.
READY, SET -- NAP
12 How to Get Ready for Kindergarten Month: With lots of red Crayons. Red tastes the best.
BLACK CAT CROSSING
13 Friday the 13th, the year's last Freaky Friday or TGIF -- Totally Gross Inescapable Fate.
FLUTTER DELIGHT
14 Butterfly Count, 9 a.m.-3 p.m. at Queen Wilhelmina State Park, Mena. Details at queenwilhelmina.com. Call (479) 394-2863.
SCOOPED AGAIN
Homegoods Day, homemade ice cream and crafts, 10 a.m.-2 p.m. at Plantation Agriculture Museum, Scott. Details at arkansas.com. Call (501) 961-1409.
WREATH OF TEETH
AROUND THE REEF
Shark Awareness Day -- just another dum-dum-dum-dum warning.
BUT FIRST, THE MOOS
15 Cow Appreciation Day leaves cows to wonder why people drive by and say, "Moo." Cows don't drive by people and say, "LOL."
COAL JUSTICE
16 National Grilling Month celebrates everything that didn't fall through the grate.
OWNER, PLEASE CLAIM
THRILL FOUND
ON BLUEBERRY HILL
17 National Blueberry Month -- the little blue month that's always picked on.
FOLKS, WE HAVE A WIENER
18 National Hot Dog Day. And in case of a foot-long, remember: It takes two hands to handle the Woofer.
COBBLER GOBBLERS
19 Johnson County Peach Festival through July 22, Clarkesville. Details at clarksvillejocochamber.com.
CABBAGE ON
20 National Deli Salad Month, and all the slaw the law allows.
FLIES GET THE BEST
OF EVERYTHING
21 Firefly Fling, 6-10 p.m. at Botanical Garden of the Ozarks, Fayetteville. Details at bgozarks.org. Call (479) 750-2620.
• Inspect an Insect weekend through July 22 at Pinnacle Mountain State Park near Little Rock. Details at arkansas.com. Call (501) 868-5806.
BUCK STARTS HERE
Bucking' in the Ozarks bull-riding, 6:30 p.m. at Parsons Stadium, Springdale. Details at rodeooftheozarks.com. Call (479) 756-0464.
YOUNG GUNS,
FAST DRAWS
22 Last day of Young Artists Exhibition at the Arkansas Arts Center, Little Rock. Details at arkansasartscenter.org. Call (501) 372-4000.
THE LION SINGS
23 LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): Is today your birthday? If so, it's time to walk the lion. Show your pride -- Ol' Mama Lion and all, and roar through July with fellow kings and queens of the jungle Arnold Schwarzenegger, 71 on July 30; and Harry Potter author J.K. Rowling, 53 on July 31.
FAIRLY SOON
Fulton County Fair and Livestock Show through July 28 at Fulton County Fairgrounds, Salem. Details at fultoncountyfair.org. Call (870) 895-5565.
ENNUI IN YOUR EYE
24 How to celebrate National Anti-Boredom Month: with EXPECTATIONS! lowered to expectations.
"Counting' flowers on the wall, that don't bother me at all." -- The Statler Brothers.
CIRCUS CHARADE
25 Send-in-the-clones quiz answer: (C). The not-so merry merry-go-round is from Ray Bradbury's novel, Something Wicked This Way Comes.
LA-LA-LA, HEY, JUICE
26 National Watermelon Month -- when drippy chins are in-in-in.
Cave City Watermelon Festival through July 28, Cave City. Details at cavecitywatermelonfestival.com. Call (870) 283-5301.
RELATIVELY SPEAKING
Aunt and Uncle Day. They keep showing up at the family picnic, but nobody knows exactly how they fit in.
BY THE LIGHT OF THE
SILVERY LOON
27 Full moon -- when even a man who is pure at heart, and says his prayers at night, may become a monkey's uncle.
GREASY KID STUFF
Name-that-tune quiz answer: (B) "Oh, oh, oh," although sometimes sung as, "oo, oo, oo," except when sung by Woody Woodpecker: "Hee-hee-hee-heh-hoo."
RUB-A-DUB-DUB,
THREE MEN IN A -- GLUB!
28 World Championship Cardboard Boat Race, 10 a.m.-3 p.m. at Sandy Beach, Heber Springs. Details at heber-springs.com. Call (501) 362-2444.
THE WAY I HERD IT
National Day of the Cowboy, and new words of cowboy wisdom:
• If cows bought the carpet, then boot tracks on the carpet are no disgrace.
• A smaller hat makes more sense than a bigger door.
• Don't wear your gun so low that a snake could grab it.
PLAN IN A PAN
29 How to celebrate National Lasagna Day: Use your noodle.
WHO-HE HOO-HA
30 Father-in-Law Day celebrates the most overlooked guy since the Invisible Man.
CHARLIE ON A HARLEY
31 Women's Motorcycle Month goes the show that behind every man, there's a woman about to pass.
Coming next month: August! Write to Ron Wolfe at
by July 15 to suggest August calendar entries or how to celebrate Aug. 19 as National Potato Day, such as: This spud's for you. All entries require a web address and/or phone number that is answered during business hours.
Style on 06/26/2018