You're out with friends, discussing the ubiquitous Law & Order.
You're trying to remember your favorite actor from the show, the guy who plays Lennie Briscoe. You start snapping your fingers rapidly and direct your eyes around the room. You either believe that the snapping will jar your brain synapses or the answer is written somewhere on the wall. But the motions tell your friends that you're trying to think of the name.
Wordless cues are nearly as entertaining as words.
You lower your eyebrows when you're puzzled by something. No need to say, "Hmm. That's odd."
You raise your eyebrows when you're shocked or dismayed: a nonverbal "I can't believe she did that again."
Groucho Marx would move his eyebrows up and down quickly when he was flirting with a woman. Few people do the eyebrow thing as well as he did.
When you're stressed out at work, you might run your fingers through your hair, sometimes leaving it sticking straight up.
You roll your eyes when you think your boss has said something ludicrous. Try not to let the boss see that, though.
When you squint your eyes in a glare, you convey that you've had it with someone, and you're not going to take it anymore. I'm not sure how soon after the glare was created that people started using the phrase, "If looks could kill ...."
You put your hands on your hips and tilt your head a little to the side. That means you're disappointed in someone. It's as if you're saying, "You're better than that!"
You can't hear something someone has said, so you put your finger behind your ear. This minute gesture won't improve your hearing one bit. It just signals to the speaker that you wish he'd talk louder or enunciate better.
You smack your forehead with your palm when you're thinking, "I am a big dummy." You wipe your forehead with the tips of your fingers once you realize that the police car siren behind you is meant for someone else.
If you're enjoying a meal, you might rub your stomach and smile. If the meal could use work, you may pinch your nose between two fingers as if to say, "This stinks."
Kids have an array of wordless signals.
Little kids often stomp their feet on the ground to show anger. I always wondered where they learn that, because I don't see many adults doing it.
Children also stick out their tongues to indicate, "You're a meanie. Why can't I have more candy?"
The thumbing of the nose is a complex, artful expression of feeling. A child places the thumb on the tip of the nose and wiggles the fingers. It means, "Ha! I am mocking you and jeering at you with one succinct gesture!"
The fist pump is the quick, emphatic motion you make to show you're happy about an accomplishment. An injured pinch-hitting Kirk Gibson gave a memorable, joyful fist pump after his walk-off home run helped the Dodgers beat the Athletics in the opening game of the 1988 World Series.
In retrospect, the fist pump I do whenever I get a bingo in Scrabble seems garish.
If your husband is ready to leave a party, he might point subtly at his wrist, indicating, "Time to go." He'll do this whether or not he's wearing a watch. First, I wonder whether this signal will fade out as fewer people wear wristwatches and more look to their cellphones for the time. Second, I wonder whether husbands in past generations would point at the area of the stomach where pocket watches resided, making their wives think they were just hungry.
Was the Adam's apple placed on the throat simply to indicate anxiety? Probably not. But in the 1988 vice presidential debates, Dan Quayle's Adam's apple bobbed up and down when Lloyd Bentsen told him, "Jack Kennedy was a friend of mine. Senator, you're no Jack Kennedy."
And I have to end with a hug, which is among the best ways to show love without uttering a word.
Oh, wait: The Law & Order actor was Jerry Orbach.
WEEKLY REVIEW
I cringe when I hear "impact" used as a verb instead of a noun. It's a police term ("The SUV impacted the back of the sedan ...") It's corporate-speak ("We can help you significantly impact the success of your small business!") And it sounds painful.
Instead of impact, you should use the verb affect.
Wrong: How does running a marathon impact you?
Right: How does running a marathon affect you?
Sources: Center for Nonverbal Studies, Psychology Today, Merriam-Webster, Bleacher Report
ActiveStyle on 06/18/2018