The best stuff

It's an irresistible impulse--the making of lists of the best this or that; and then comparing what I've come up with to the lists of others. I'm even a sucker for those online pieces on the world's 10 best beaches or the best hamburger joints and steakhouses in each state.

Whenever I see one, I feel the urge to come up with my own.

It's silly in many ways; after all, how can you decide that the Mona Lisa is "better" than The Garden of Earthly Delights or The Magic Mountain "better" than The Sun Also Rises?

Still, lists are fun to play around with, and make for a nice break from having to think about (or, worse still, write more about) Donald Trump, Hillary Clinton and the decline of the republic.

So herewith, some random lists, with a healthy dose of NFL to celebrate the start of the season:

• Best NFL running backs: 1. Jim Brown (despite his Colin Kaepernick endorsement); 2. Barry Sanders; 3. Walter Payton; 4. Emmitt Smith; 5. Eric Dickerson; 6. Gale Sayers; 7. LaDainian Tomlinson; 8. Earl Campbell; 9. Adrian Peterson; 10. Tony Dorsett. More: O.J. Simpson; Marshall Faulk, Jim Taylor; John Riggins; and Marcus Allen.

• Best World War II novels: 1. Evelyn Waugh's Sword of Honor trilogy; 2. Joseph Heller's Catch-22; 3. Herman Wouk's Winds of War (and second installment War and Remembrance); 4. Norman Mailer's The Naked and the Dead; 5. Wouk's The Caine Mutiny; 6. Olivia Manning's Fortunes of War (consisting of two trilogies, The Balkan Trilogy and The Levant Trilogy); 7. James Jones' The Thin Red Line; 8. Vasily Grossman's Life and Fate; 9. James Clavell's King Rat; and 10. Nicholas Monsarrat's The Cruel Sea. More: James Gould Cozzens' Guard of Honor; Leon Uris' Battle Cry; Edward Beach's Run Silent, Run Deep; Jones' From Here to Eternity; and Alistair MacLean's Guns of Navarone (significant omission: Slaughterhouse-Five--neither it nor Kurt Vonnegut have held up well).

• Best NBA players (Wally Hall had a good list in a column a few months back, so it got me to thinking): 1. Michael Jordan (of course); 2. Wilt Chamberlain; 3. Bill Russell; 4. LeBron James; 5. Magic Johnson; 6. Oscar Robertson; 7. Larry Bird; 8. Kareem Abdul-Jabbar; 9. Elgin Baylor; and 10. Shaquille O'Neil. More: Tim Duncan, Jerry West, Julius Irving, Kobe Bryant, and Hakeem Alajuwon.

• Best "westerns": 1. The Searchers; 2. The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly (along with predecessors A Fistful of Dollars and For a Few Dollars More); 3. The Man Who Shot Liberty Valance; 4. The Wild Bunch; 5. Once Upon a Time in the West; 6. Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid; 7. High Noon; 8. The Outlaw Josey Wales; 9. McCabe & Mrs. Miller; and 10. Unforgiven. More: Rio Bravo; Lonesome Dove (a TV miniseries but ...); Stagecoach; Red River; and Ride the High Country.

• Best NFL quarterbacks (of the Super Bowl era): 1. Johnny Unitas; 2. Joe Montana; 3. Tom Brady; 4. Peyton Manning; 5. John Elway; 6. Roger Staubach; 7. Dan Marino, 8. Aaron Rodgers; 9. Steve Young; and 10. Bart Starr. Others: Fran Tarkington, Bret Favre; Troy Aikman; Terry Bradshaw; and Drew Brees (sorry, Broadway Joe).

• Best Rolling Stones songs: 1. "Satisfaction"; 2. "Gimme Shelter"; 3. "Paint It Black"; 4. "Jumpin' Jack Flash"; 5. "Time is on My Side" (their version is best); 6. "Brown Sugar"; 7. "Beast of Burden"; 8. "It's Only Rock 'n' Roll"; 9. "Moonlight Mile"; and 10. "Tumbling Dice." More: "Tell Me (You're Coming Back)"; "Stray Cat Blues"; "Street Fighting Man"; "Sweet Virginia"; and "Happy."

• Best NFL Coaches: 1. Vince Lombardi; 2. George Halas; 3. Don Shula; 4. Paul Brown; 5. Tom Landry; 6. Bill Belichick; 7. Bill Walsh; 8. Joe Gibbs; 9. Chuck Noll; and 10. Bill Parcells. Others: Bud Grant; Tony Dungy; John Madden; Curly Lambeau; and Jimmy Johnson.

• Best albums (rock, blues or jazz): 1. John Coltrane and Johnny Hartman; 2. Miles Davis' Kind of Blue; 3. Frank Sinatra's Songs for Swingin' Lovers; 4. The Beatles' Rubber Soul; 5. Charlie Parker with Strings; 6. The Dave Brubeck Quartet's Time Out; 7. The Beatles' Revolver; 8. Ella Fitzgerald and Louis Armstrong, Ella and Louis; 9. The Rolling Stones' Sticky Fingers; and 10. Art Pepper Meets the Rhythm Section. Others: Sinatra's Sings for Only the Lonely; The Beach Boys' Pet Sounds; The Rolling Stones' Exile on Main Street; The Bill Evans Trio's Waltz for Debby; and Sonny Rollins' Saxophone Colossus.

• Best Cold War thrillers: 1. John le Carre's The Spy Who Came in From the Cold; 2. Ian Fleming's From Russia With Love; 3. Richard Condon's The Manchurian Candidate; 4. Norman Mailer's Harlot's Ghost; 5. le Carre's Tinker, Tailor, Soldier, Spy; 6. Graham Greene's Our Man in Havana; 7. Len Deighton's The Ipcress File; 8. Charles McCarry's The Tears of Autumn; 9. le Carre's Smiley's People; and 10. Tom Clancy's The Hunt for the Red October. Others: William F. Buckley's Mongoose, RIP; McCarry's Lucky Bastard; Leon Uris' Topaz; James Grady's Six Days of the Condor; and Eugene Burdick and Harvey Wheeler's Fail-Safe.

• Best NFL helmets/jerseys: 1. Cowboys; 2. Raiders; 3. Giants; 4. Bears; and 5. Chargers (the powder blue ones). Ugliest: Vikings (purple?).

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Freelance columnist Bradley R. Gitz, who lives and teaches in Batesville, received his Ph.D. in political science from the University of Illinois.

Editorial on 09/26/2016

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