MALE CALL

Is wearing hats, sunglasses indoors fashion or foible?

Q. I realize hats and sunglasses are part of some fashion statements, but what is the rule for wearing them indoors?

Why do men insist on leaving hats on in a restaurant or a movie or a speaking event? Do I have a right to remind people that they are indoors and to remove it?

A. You sound like a guy after my own heart!

I, too, am often tempted to tell someone that his behavior is inappropriate. But I'm afraid that telling anyone who is not one's child what is and is not appropriate is not acceptable behavior these days.

Long ago, there were strict rules of etiquette about wearing a hat indoors. Just as a man stepped across the threshold on his way into a house or just as he stepped into an elevator, he removed his hat.

Wearing a hat indoors was considered rude. That also was the era when men consistently wore hats. Now, while there is a resurgence of fedoras, porkpies and the like by Justin Timberlake, Pharrell, etc., more of them are baseball caps worn by the balding.

In essence, wearing a hat indoors is still widely thought of by many as rude. And if not exactly rude, then at least questionable behavior and rather impolite.

Because I wasn't sure how widely accepted my attitude was, I polled quite a few people. Some words that kept coming up during these conversations included crass, tacky, uncouth, gauche, pretentious and silly. One person said, "'Yes, it's rude. And if I see you doing it, I will silently judge you!'"

On the other hand, some find this blanket condemnation stuck up and fusty.

Styles and times change. To many, a hat is more a stylistic accessory than a culturally significant item worn in traditional ways.

But, ultimately, it is really all these things: clothing, culture and accessory. And while it's certainly not clear cut, it also is not that complicated. There are places where it feels OK to keep the hat on, and places where it doesn't. It is often situation-dependent (location/event). It also hinges on the people you are with (traditionalists or hipsters).

In places where our tradition requires respect -- such as a church or other house of worship; at milestones like weddings or funerals; during hallowed moments like the national anthem or in hallowed places like a consecrated field or inside a memorial -- men should doff their hats.

In places where the custom is not known -- if invited to a ceremony within another culture outside one's own -- people should remove their hats to avoid offense.

However, where the hat wearer bothers no one and nothing beyond your sense of tradition or style, let it go.

The clothes horse who keeps his hat on at a raucous dinner buffet truly harms no one. That conference, train car, graduation party, ballgame, etc., are not places for your pronouncements on fashion's do's and don'ts.

Should we make an exception for hats that are part of a person's overall look? Women have always had the option of using various devices to improve their appearance, such as makeup and choosing flattering styles. Men, who have far fewer options, may feel the need to rely on such accessories as hats and, yes, sunglasses to amp up their look.

Since an important use of clothing is to communicate nonverbal messages about ourselves, people receive and read those messages. Why not show your sense of style in a way that suits your comfort zone?

Even so, the one time I think you have every right to ask someone to remove his hat is when he is sitting in front of you in the theater or at a similar event and the hat may block your view.

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High Profile on 04/24/2016

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