Otus the Head Cat

Sometimes, 'mater is just a 'mater (not this time)

This sliced tomato shows a remarkable likeness of Otus the Head
Cat in the center. Did it also have miraculous curative powers?
This sliced tomato shows a remarkable likeness of Otus the Head Cat in the center. Did it also have miraculous curative powers?

Dear Otus,

Please tell me that someone got a photo of the tomato that had the remarkable likeness of you on the inside. Everyone I've talked to says it was a miracle.

-- M.C. Byles,

Warren

Dear M.C.,

It was wholly a pleasure to hear from you and to marvel along with the faithful.

It was, simply put, the most phenomenal case of mass pareidolia on record in the state of Arkansas since Our Elvis of the Bear Claw in '87.

According to the Warren Eagle-Democrat, more than 1,300 true believers from as far away as Fordyce, Hamburg and McGehee made the pilgrimage last Sunday to view the manifestation of Our Head Cat of the Garden.

The "miracle" took place in the greenhouse behind the Bradley County home of Clovis and Vivian Malott, which lies near the Saline River just north of Warren on U.S. 63.

Pareidolia, for those not up on their cultural phenomena, is a type of image or illusion not normally encountered in the circumstances involved. In this case, among the Malotts' tomatoes.

Some noteworthy pareidoliae include the 1984 Our Lady of the Burrito, where the Virgin Mary was seen in a take-out order from a Taco Bell in Clovis, N.M.; the Smiling St. Afra of the Mall, where thousands witnessed a vision of a robed woman beaming from a skylight above the Footlocker store in Georgia's Marietta Mall; and the Elvis of the Ablutions, where a vision of the King shimmered for three days in the spray coming out of the Dirt-N-Squirt Carwash in Butte, Mont.

Under normal circumstances, pareidolia are harmless. However, sometimes the faithful attribute special powers to these phantasms, and life and limb can be at risk in the stampede.

In the case of the Elvis in the bear claw, a near riot ensued at The Blue Flame cafe in Forrest City when word got out that the image of Elvis could be seen in one of chef Chato Murciano's legendary pastries.

What made the vision so unusual was not only that it occurred on the 10th anniversary of Elvis' death, but also that it was of Elvis, the early years. Most Elvis pareidolia assume the shape of Elvis, the Vegas years. Word spread and perhaps 250 rowdy fans got off Interstate 40 demanding to see the baked goody before it was eaten accidentally by Murciano's slow son, Harley, who mistook the thing for breakfast.

I'm not sure what people expected to accomplish from being near an Elvis bear claw, but it was obvious they expected miracles last weekend in Warren.

"It's the goll darnedest thing I ever seed," Clovis Malott told a reporter. "I swear it looked just like the picture of Otus the Head Cat in the paper. You could make out the eyes and the ears and the mouth -- it looked just like him. After we read Otus' column in the Saturday paper, we went to the greenhouse to pick 'maters, cut one open and there it was plain as day."

Finding the incarnation of a cat inside a tomato might not seem all that unusual for seasoned gardeners who grow a variety of produce. What made this case so unusual was that Malott claims the pareidolia cured his plants of a variety of horticultural ills.

"I don't really know how to explain it," Malott said, "but before the thing showed up, we had the worst cases of botrytis blossom blight and didymellina leaf spot we've ever had. The plants were ate up with septoria and rhizoctonia somethin' awful. Then, it was all cured."

Word of the miracle spread like wildfire. Before the Malotts could turn around, their greenhouse was overrun with those seeking their own miracle cures. The crowd was orderly for the most part as it queued up down the lawn and out into the gravel drive. Clovis started charging a buck a head to approach the thing.

"Folks were bringing baskets of cucumbers and peppers afflicted with gray leaf mold and gummy stem blight," Malott said. "They'd put them down in front of the manifestation and pray for a miracle. I don't know if it was working or not, but one fellow with a particularly nasty case of alternaria on his broccoli swears it disappeared before his eyes."

Unsubstantiated reports indicate pilgrims claim the Otus tomato miraculously cured their fruits and vegetables of adelgids, earwigs, lace bugs, psyllids and thrips. The next morning the pareidolia had vanished.

I'm not certain what to make of all this -- except to say that I do not now license, nor have I ever licensed, any corporeal or vegetative representation of my likeness for fungicidal or pesticidal purposes.

Until next time, Kalaka reminds you there's one born every minute.

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