Change: It happens

Time passes, things change, policies are amended

Saturday, January 25, 2014

PITY the country’s military brass in the year 2014. It wasn’t like this in the old days, was it, gentlemen? Oh, and ladies, too. Let’s not forget This Man’s Army is now also this woman’s. And you’re just as likely to call a colonel ma’am as sir these days.

Back in days of yore, like before the 1990s, the military was no place for politically correct types. Can you imagine going back in time and asking your drill sergeant to clean up his language? If so, you’ve got a powerful imagination.

Back then there weren’t a lot of conferences in the style of today’s editorial boards to determine the consensus of the group. If the military didn’t want you doing something, it just told you not to do it. And if you didn’t like it, you could lump it-and, by the way, drop and give me 50 for even asking. You volunteered for this!

But times do change. Sometimes even for the better. Now even that Clinton-era runaround called Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell is a no-go at this station. And homosexuals can serve their country without having to lie about their identity. This certainly isn’t your grandpa’s Army. And shouldn’t be.

Word came the other day that the Pentagon has changed even more rules, this time about hair length and head coverings when they involve religious sensibilities.

Says the new, amended policy: “The needs of the requesting service member are balanced against the needs of mission accomplishment. Only if it is determined that the needs of mission accomplishment outweigh the needs of the service member may the request be denied.” Which is the Army way of saying Use Some Common Sense for God’s Sake.

Now a yarmulke or dreadlocks may be allowed for those of certain persuasions in certain circumstances. These days the military is coming dangerously close to exercising some common sense.

And to think, the Pentagon came up with these new, more flexible rules. Uh oh. We may have to revise our stereotypes.

The key to understanding this new policy lies in understanding the individual trooper’s (a) religious needs, and (b) assigned duties. But the mission still comes first, as the new policy makes clear. In short, if he’s going into combat, the ’cruit will shave that beard. A close shave now literally could save his life in a figurative one later.

RECALL all those portraits and daguerreotypes of Civil War officers? How many had long, flowing beards? And flowing locks to boot. Think of a Union general named Custer, who took great pride in his coiffure and ’stache. And he wasn’t the only one. A general named Burnside even gave us the term sideburns. Though he would prove less effective as a commander, no matter how hirsute, than style-setter. Elvis fans now have reason to thank him.

Then came along the 20th Century. And something called poison gas.

The troops had to figure out a way to get their gas masks on, and fast, in combat. Officer or enlisted man, it made no difference. Mustard gas was notoriously insensitive to the finer points of rank. And the facial hair had to go. Gas masks can’t seal properly with bushy sideburns and ZZ Top beards in the way.

The first gas masks have undergone many a change by now, but poison gas is still poison. Which is why any kid going through boot camp just now isn’t exactly looking forward to The Tent and its tear gas fumes. Yes, drill sergeants still put the recruits through that exercise.

Ask any Syrian civilian who lost family last August in that sarin-gas attack if poison gas is still around. And, oh, what our enemies in Afghanistan and elsewhere wouldn’t give for their own stockpile of the stuff. Or may have given by now. You never know. Which is why the facial hair has to come off.

Be Prepared isn’t just a motto for Boy Scouts. Folks with a different code of conduct than ours are out there. And they’re still a menace.

So off with the hairy look, soldier. Unless maybe you’re stationed in Fort Riley, Kansas, and pushing papers behind a desk. Circumstances can be all in these things. As the wearers of beards and turbans might be first to recognize. And now the U.S. military has recognized that simple fact of life, too. Will wonders never cease?

BUT some things haven’t changed, to wit the old truth that you can’t please everybody. Some folks, predictably enough, aren’t happy with the new rules. But you might be surprised at who, and why. An outfit called the Sikh Coalition is agin the new policy. Because, it says, the new rules don’t go far enough. It says it’s not fair that a soldier who wants to wear a beard or turban has to get permission from the military. And, its director adds, commanders get too much say on the matter. To which there can only be one sensible reply: You’re in the Army now!

Commanders decide all sorts of things for their troops. In turn, the military decides all sorts of things for its commanders. This new policy is understandable enough. More important, it’s fair and workable. To sum up its key provision: Mission first. As it always has been.

If some folks don’t like that, let it be noted that the United States of America now has an all-volunteer military. If its rules don’t suit everybody, there’s always the private sector.

As they say at the end of those Army announcements broadcast across camp, That Is All.

Editorial, Pages 16 on 01/25/2014