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THE ROCKWOOD FILES: The Summer Commandments

MOSES NEVER REVEALED THE RULES FOR SWIMSUIT SIN

Posted: June 12, 2013 at 5 a.m.

Lo, the time had come, and we hastened to the mall to seek out the most worthy swimsuit, for summer was upon us. We sought refuge in the dressing rooms where we squirmed into stretchy fabrics and tied spaghetti straps around our necks. We tugged and hooked and tied and then turned slowly toward the great reflecting glass. And lo, there was much weeping and gnashing of teeth.” So it was then, and so it is now. The annual hunt for a flattering swimsuit has plagued women through the ages. On the top 10 list of loathsome things to do, shopping for a swimsuit ranks a strong second, right behind the annual gynecological exam.

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Life, Pages 7 on 06/12/2013

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