OTUS THE HEAD CAT

Pods’ viscous cycle began late, but it’s going strong

Dear Otus,

It was 69 degrees last March when we moved into our retirement home here from Eau Claire, Wis. I played kubb the next day and golf the day after that. In March!

But all our new neighbors kept saying, “Just wait until the humidity pods arrive.” Well, they must have arrived. We had all that rain last week, then the sun came out and I’m told the heat index hit 110. My Swedish blood is too thin for this.

They tell me you’re the expert on these pod things. What is going on?

  • Jegar Alltforsvettig, Bella Vista

Dear Jegar,

It was wholly a pleasure to hear from you. And welcome to Arkansas.

Welcome to Arkansas … in August.

Even though you are from the far frozen north, you surely did not believe that there wasn’t a price to pay for playing kubb in March. I’m informed that it was so humid up there at the Kingswood Golf & Kubb Course that the batons became stuck to the blocks.

Maintenance crews spent the day un-gooing the kings.

Yes, the pods giveth and the pods taketh away.

What you are experiencing now is not the pods themselves, but the climatological detritus that ensues after the pods’ arrival. August is the sweltering, energy-sapping, tepid miasma that follows the annual arrival of the humidity pods.

This year the pods actually arrived a little late - on June 17 to be exact. Natives (Owner’s people arrived in Greene County in 1820) and longtime residents know well that the pods can vary their arrival time by several weeks.

Arkansas residents have come to take the summertime arrival of the humidity pods and the viscous aftermath in stride.

What, exactly, are humidity pods? Well, they don’t make it up to Eau Claire, that’s for sure.

The gelatinous, amorphous pods winter off Tampico in Mexico’s Bay of Campeche. They’ve been known to venture as far north as Texas’ South Padre Island by early May before sending scouts scooting northward.

The typically spherical rogue pods - some as large as minivans, but most the size of basketballs - always seem to surprise some by their arrival, despite the yearly admonitions by authorities.

Humidity pods are a phenomenon that has awed local inhabitants for hundreds of years, including the Spanish explorer Hernando De Soto, who noted the pods in his journal in July 1541, calling them “sudor del diablo.”

According to the Arkansas Chapter of the American Meteorological Society and National Weather Association, the pods usually arrive in the Little Rock area between May 31 and the last week of July.

The local North Little Rock AMS/NWA chapter is the official keeper of the Arkansas pod records. According to the August edition of their newsletter, The Weathervane, the huge masses (they look like small gray dirigibles made of suet) moved into Little Rock at 10:42 a.m. June 17 and reached Bella Vista at 4:03 p.m.

The pods’ severity is measured on the Fujita Pod Scale (adopted in 1987) and ancillary associated and accompanying mesoscale convective systems.

In layman’s terms, the pod scale, or FPS, goes from FPS1 (weak) to FPS5 (biblical). This year’s humidity pod event measured FPS3 (moderate).

After the pods migrate from their wintering grounds and disperse, the relative humidity slowly elevates until the heat index soars to uncomfortable levels. Arkansas remains miserably sticky until about mid-September, when the pod effect slowly dissipates, and the pod matter returns to the warm Gulf waters.

One of the main concerns for state educators is that childhood awareness of the humidity pods and their effects is waning. Officials blame this on an increasing tendency of Arkansas children to remain indoors during the summer months to play video games.

Unfortunately, more schools’ “fall semesters” are beginning toward the middle of August when the pod effect is at its worst. Schoolchildren ensconced in the insular cocoons of air-conditioned classrooms remain ignorant of the climate enveloping them.

That’s why this year the mandatory teaching of “Humidity Pods and You” has been added to the curricula of Arkansas middle schools. The pilot project was at downtown Little Rock’s eStem school where the state’s science teachers attended a week-long workshop in June to prepare for the course.

In addition, Little Rock’s recently renovated Museum of Discovery features a nifty hands-on exhibit where kids can create their own mini-pods and watch them envelope caterpillars and lizards. I’m told it’s the second most popular interactive exhibit, right behind the frying ants with a magnifying glass demonstration in the WOW Gallery.

Until next time, Kalaka reminds you to remember the humidity pods when you’re shoveling that 2-inch “blizzard” in January.

Disclaimer Fayetteville-born Otus the Head Cat’s award-winning column of humorous fabrication appears every Saturday. Email:

[email protected]

HomeStyle, Pages 36 on 08/17/2013

Upcoming Events