LITTLE ROCK — Dear Otus,
Our family reunion will be in Little Rock on Saturday for the annual humidity pod evanescence. Where will be the best spot to observe the phenomenon?
- Stan Deezy, East End
Dear Stan,
It was wholly a pleasure to hear from you again.
And welcome back. I well recall the 2002 Deezy clan reunion at Murray Park. I understand no charges were filed. No harm, no foul.
And thanks for the e-mail. It gives me the opportunity to remind all Arkansans that today is the big day when fall officially arrives and brings with it the annual dissemination of summer’s oppressive humidity pods.
The exact moment when that magical phenomenon happens depends on where you live in Arkansas (see below).
Longtime residents often describe the sudden, sparkling pod evanescence of their youth as “awe-inspiring, remarkable, exhilarating” and “amazing.”
Still others have used adjectives such as “life-affirming, salubrious, capricious,salutary” and “phenomenal.” The less articulate, but equally enthusiastic, among us use words such as “cool” and “keen.”
However you choose to describe it, note that the event is set to occur precisely six hours after the arrival of the autumnal equinox. That’s when the sun appears to traverse the celestial equator.
For the Northern Hemisphere, that will be 14:49 Universal Time (Greenwich Mean Time) today - or at 9:49 a.m. CDT.
Six hours later is when the humidity pods will evaporate - 3:49 p.m. More or less. There’s still some calculating to figure out.
The 9:49 a.m. fall arrival time is for the entire central time zone, which extends from middle Tennessee to far west Texas. In addition, the zone does not conform to a uniform temporal astronomical dictate across its entire breadth.
Technically, the autumnal equinox arrives when the sun, which has been steadily moving south since the summer solstice of June 20, crosses the apparent equatorial sublatitudes in a diurnal trajectory of seasonal cohesion.
On equinox day, the sun rises directly in the east, appears directly overhead at noon, and sets exactly at due west.
To be fully prepared to observe Arkansas’ annual pod purgation, one must calculate precisely where one is within the central time zone.
Little Rock, for example, is at 34 degrees 44 minutes north latitude, and 92 degrees 14 minutes west longitude. It is 350-odd miles west of the zone’s eastern boundary. Parts of Arkansas are 100 or more miles farther west.
Since the sun is headed across the sky at a mean westerly speed of 1,000 mph, it takes an additional 21 minutes for the equinox to reach Little Rock.
Add those 21 minutes to the universal time and that means the radian bifurcated equinox will occur in Little Rock precisely at 10:10 a.m. today. Add the six hours required for pod re-congelation and the Deezy family reunion can look for pod evaporation and dispersal at 4:10 p.m.
Have your cameras set up in advance. It normally takes no more than 45 seconds for the pods to finally congeal and about three minutes for the spectacular fog-like event to transpire. The longest pod evanescence on record was a breath-taking eight minutes in 1976 in Hot Springs.
The shortest was just under a minute and a half in Sheridan in 1961.
Longtime readers suggest any place near water as favorable for viewing the pod departure. Along the Arkansas River is good with its distant views and dramatic backdrops. I suggest getting to one of the pedestrian bridges early and staking out a prime camera spot.
As usual, many communities will be making a special day of the event and Bella Vista is the place to be if you are into festivals.
Bella Vistians, by the way, will also be celebrating the Neopagan Sabbat of Mabon today. Take your own golf carts to the jousting tournament at noon. Perfidy is optional.
Until next time, Kalaka reminds Fayetteville fans that the humidity pod dispersal will be over in plenty of time for you to make it inside the stadium for the kickoff of the Razorbacks’ game against Rutgers.
Disclaimer
Fayetteville-born Otus the Head Cat’s award-winning column of humorous fabrication appears every Saturday. E-mail:
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