Victim’s grandfather forgiving

Fayetteville relative of slain boy, 6, has compassion for shooter

A man pays respects Monday in Newtown, Conn., near a U.S. flag with the names of victims on a makeshift memorial, including that of Jesse Lewis, whose grandfather David Lewis lives in Fayetteville.
A man pays respects Monday in Newtown, Conn., near a U.S. flag with the names of victims on a makeshift memorial, including that of Jesse Lewis, whose grandfather David Lewis lives in Fayetteville.

When he learned of the death of his grandson in the school shooting in Newtown, Conn., David Lewis of Fayetteville said that he forgave the shooter.

Jesse Lewis, 6, and 25 other people were killed Friday in the shooting rampage at Sandy Hook Elementary School in Newtown.

The gunman, Adam Lanza, shot and killed himself inside the school.

Twenty of the victims were 6- and 7-year-old students, and six were adults.

The Rev. Lowell E. Grisham, rector at St. Paul’s Episcopal Church in Fayetteville, visited with parishioner David Lewis soon after he heard about his grandson’s death.

“David spoke with compassion about whatever suffering and confusion that man must have been through to do something like this,” Grisham said during his Sunday sermon.

Grisham said he attended a forum for chief executives Friday morning with Lewis and others in Fayetteville. The topic became forgiveness, and Lewis continued that message Friday afternoon after he had learned of Jesse’s death.

“David spoke of a hopethat comes from a wider perspective - an internal and cosmic and spiritual perspective,” Grisham said in his sermon at the church’s two services Sunday morning, which attracted a total crowd of about 450.

“David was living what he had spoken a few hours earlier,” Grisham said Monday. “David was living the reality, as awful as it is. David forgave the shooter.”

Lewis didn’t respond to a reporter’s e-mail seeking comment.

Tim McFarland, facilitator of Friday’s CEO Forum by Elevate, said the monthly events normally concern topics such as strategy or business-model evaluation. But on Friday, topics during thethree-hour forum included yoga, forgiveness and “choosing love.”

“David was talking about how we have to forgive everyone,” said McFarland.

If we don’t, resentment festers inside, said Grisham, remembering Lewis’ words from the Friday session.

After learning of the shooting from his daughter, Scarlett Lewis, David Lewis told Grisham, “You have to accept reality” and live in the present.

A private funeral for the boy is planned Thursday, a family member confirmed.

Grisham said that Saturday morning, a flier he had brought home from the forum caught his attention. It was titled “Lessons Learned.” The lessons were written by John Lewis, David Lewis’ brother, who founded the Bank of Fayetteville in 1987 and died in2007 of a heart attack.

One of the lessons was “Reality is not moral.”

“If a speeding bullet hits a human being, there will be damage,” Grisham told his congregation Sunday. “It is what it is. Deep acceptance anchors our hope for stability. To let go of our expectations allows us to face reality, which is the only way we can be happy - alive, awake to the here and now. It is what it is. If we are to be content within reality, we will have to first accept it, and secondly, be grounded in thankfulness. Gratitude is the foundation of contentment, John [Lewis] says.”

Grisham ended his sermon Sunday by encouraging the congregation to choose love.

“It is the energy that overcomes all, even death itself,” he said.

Northwest Arkansas, Pages 7 on 12/18/2012

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