LITTLE ROCK — Q. I’m in a quandary. I’ve become attached to my clothes and I just don’t seem to know when to let them go. Can you give me some specific advice on “when to dump old clothes”? I tend to hold onto things, especially ones that have brought me compliments. But I’m sure some of them must be ready for the junk heap. How do I know?
A. There are many ways to decide when to let a garment go. One rule is: “If I haven’t worn it in two years, I give it to Goodwill.” Or “If it looks too tight, don’t count on losing weight.” Or “If the fabric is even the least bit shabby, give it up.” And styles (even men’s styles) change. For example, if the width of ties has changed, the necktie is passe. These rules are all excellent guidelines. You may ask yourself, “But what if I lose that weight or they come back in style?” That might happen; powdered wigs might alsocome back! But it’s best not to clutter your closet or your mind with such choices.
I would like to add one more crucial rule - it is my all-time favorite: Learn to trust your mirror. Try things on and check yourself out in the mirror with an honest, totally critical eye toward fit, style and how flattering the color is. If the garment falls short in one (or more) of these categories, the answer should be clear. We all know that men hate to try things on, in stores or at home. But, honestly, that is the only way to know what looks good. Holding a garment up against your body and checking it out in the mirror would seem to be enough, but for some unknown reason, it is not. You have to put the garment on and look at yourself in the mirror. I promise that the mirror will tell you; sometimes it almost shouts at you. “Wow! I really look good in this.” Or it may just say “Blah,” because youfade into the background in that garment.
Oddly enough, just because something looked good on you last year doesn’t mean it looks good now. For any of a variety of subtle reasons, the same item may have lost its panache, and you should make the wise decision to give it up. While this idea may be more of an effort than some men are willing to try, the truth is that sometimes it is not just whether the shirt itself looks good, but what pants or jacket does it go with? The answer to whether something looks great or not often depends on the item “in combination.”
We are all saddled with human baggage. Our upbringing may trouble us with feelings of guilt when getting rid of “perfectly wearable” (who says?) clothes. Our thrifty natures may impose all kinds of other don’t-throw-it-away restrictions. Some people have no conflict with weeding out anddiscarding. But my guess is that more of us are savers.
If saving is a problem for you, here is an extremely helpful two-step solution. If you collect all the questionable clothes and relegate them to a different closet or the back of the closet as an interim step in the throwing-out process, you are on your way. After a year or even a few months, it is a lot easier to move your collection out of the house.
Giving clothes to the needy is a soul-satisfying experience. Organizations (such as Goodwill, Vietnam Veterans of America, Lupus Foundation of America) will pick them up, and when you get on their mailing list, they may even send you bags for that purpose. Also, with most, you can take charitable gifts off of your income tax (but find out details from your accountant).
Besides making your conscience feel good, an added advantage is that your closets are less cluttered, your clothes have room to breathe, it becomes easier to organize like items, and it is easier to find what you are looking for to wear.
Often the biggest problem is not between the definite “keep” items and the definite “giveaway” items. It is those other “should I have them fixed?” garments. Most of the time, the answer is “no.” Not always, of course, but usually. If moth holes have developed, re-weaving is costly (still, if the garment is expensive and a favorite, it could be worthwhile). If tie styles have narrowed, you can have wide ties made slimmer; but if ties have widened, do you really want to save them for two more style cycles? By that time, you can be sure some other variation will have made them look out-of-date.
Be strong. If in doubt, put it in the giveaway bag.
Q. Among the things that bother me about men’s clothes is how hard it is to find something specific when it is not popular. I like sweaters, but I prefer cardigans. I can’t find them anywhere. Can you help?
A. My guess is that, like most men, you shop in one or two convenient stores that you are used to, and if those stores don’t have something, you think no one does.
This year - and in fact, for the past two years - cardigans have become so popular that you should be able to find them just about everywhere, from the finest men’s specialtyshops to major department stores, and also in outlet and discount stores. Even if you did not find them in those couple of stores you regularly frequent, keep looking. They are definitely available.
Cardigans range from traditional styling to fashion-forward. Today they don’t all look like your grandfather’s, with big leather buttons. And even the more traditional styles offer variations: different fabrics and weights; shawl collars; solids as well as stripes, sport motifs, argyles and other patterns; some have leather or fabric elbow patches. Many of the most fashionable ones are designed with the newly popular zip-fronts - a sleek innovation that updates an old style, a crossover between a sweater and a jacket. Some have attached hoods (known as “hoodies”), but these are less popular this year. I recently saw a few very stylish cardigans that were doublebreasted rather than the basic single-breasted style. Another trend: not all winter cardigans are wool. They come in all-cotton, cotton/silk blends, heavy silk and cashmere in a wide range of styles and prices.
If David’s or Tony’s Men’s Store where you normally shop does not have what you want, check out a smart specialty shop or a large quality store such as Nordstrom, Lord & Taylor, Saks Fifth Avenue or Neiman Marcus. You may think you cannot afford to shopin such places; well, you can for one item that you really want. I’m not suggesting you move up for all of your clothes, but you can certainly buy one sweater in a more expensive store if you have something specific in mind. And if you check out the Internet, you will find so many cardigans you’ll have trouble deciding which one you want. In truth, in today’s economy, most better stores and websites are offering top-quality clothes - including cardigan sweaters - at very attractive “sale” prices. You may be surprised at how far your dollar goes.
A further word of advice: If you discover a style that you really like, such as the new zip-front cardigan, I suggest buying more than one (say, in two colors), while they are still popular. Then you’ll have them in your closet when they become harder to find.
Send your questions for Male Call to:
lois.[email protected]
High Profile, Pages 53 on 10/24/2010