LIKE IT IS: Chizik like watching paint dry, but hired to win

— Robbie Caldwell, Vanderbilt’s interim head coach, was funny and entertaining.

Auburn’s Gene Chizik was not.

Chizik was about as exciting as cold tomato soup.

He made Alabama’s stoic Nick Saban seem like Chris Rock without the profanity.

Granted, it is not Chizik’s job to be funny or entertaining, but it was like he forgot to leave a wake-up call for his 8:30 a.m. appointment with the media covering SEC football media days Friday.

Make no mistake, he’s a terrific defensive coordinator.

His resume includes two undefeated seasons, 13-0 in 2005 at Texas when the Longhorns beat Southern Cal for the BCS national championship and 13-0 withAuburn in 2004.

That is most of why he’s the Tigers’ head coach even though he was 5-19 as a head coach at Iowa State.

Despite his demeanor, and he couldn’t have been less enthusiastic and energetic facing a firing squad, there is some orange and blue Kool-Aid that people are drinking.

The media voted that Auburn would finish third in the SEC West, ahead of LSU, Mississippi State and Ole Miss. (Alabama was first and Arkansas second.)

Auburn does have 16 starters back from an 8-5 season, but the sum total of quality victories was one, and that was against Ole Miss and may have had a lot to do with Gus Malzahn, whom Chizik never mentioned by name.

He did, however, say, “We have to figure out a way to be more consistent on offense. We have to be able to run the ball more this season.

“We had plays where we scored quick and fast. I don’t have a problem with that. What we need to address, what we saw in the off-season, is how can we sustain longer drives. That means getting first downs and running the football.”

Those might seem like red flags coming from a head coach who lives and breathes defense, but Chizik did get some raises for his staff andMalzahn now reportedly makes $500,000 a year to be the offensive coordinator for the Tigers.

Plus, Chizik, like most of the SEC coaches, didn’t mention any of his staff by name and he said, “I felt it was important to have some continuity on our staff. This is the first time some of the guys have had the same coordinator for a second consecutive year.”

Which was one of his more compelling statements.

He was about as exciting as inheritance tax.

Saying he was careful not to reveal too much would be like saying the Auburn nation doesn’t vacation in Tuscaloosa.

He actually said: “What we’re trying to do is build a program for the future.”

Which is good. Very goodsince the past was taken care of by the likes of Shug Jordan, Pat Dye and Tommy Tuberville.

And he said: “We look back at what we did last year, and we see at times we played well, and at times we didn’t.”

How many football coaches could say that? All of them.

His phrase of the day, which he used frequently, was: “He’s an Auburn guy.”

He said that about Lee Ziemba, a senior offensive tackle from Rogers, and that “Lee had a chance to come out early for the draft and he chose to come back. He’s going to break the record for consecutive starts. We expect a big year from him. He’s tremendously talented.”

That’s high praise considering the source, but stating the obvious is one of his stronger speaking talents.

When asked about the similarities Auburn might have with the Razorbacks, he said: “Hard to compare. Arkansas is returning a very good football team. Coach [Bobby] Petrino, who I’ve been on staff with, is a very good football coach. This is his third year, and the guys know what’s expected.”

Admittedly, Auburn didn’t hire Chizik to be the voice of the Tigers and he’s apparently a little better in smaller groups.

What the Tigers want is for him to win, especially against Alabama.

When an Auburn coach does that, he is entertaining enough for the Tigers nation.

Sports, Pages 29 on 07/25/2010

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